Ego

There were times in our life where we had a rift with our friend, sister, Brother, parents, neighbours, team mates, class mates, Gym mates, Jog mates and much more.

All this for a simple reason Ego

Ego I checked online what it means, it gave me several synonyms the one which I liked was “The I or self of any person” When we think of something or when we do something we always think about I, not that everyone do the same but yes most of us just think about I. 

A simple “I do it my way” brings down the friendship in a split second. A simple “I am this way” brings down relationship in a jiffy. A simple “I can’t do it” brings bitterness between two. A simple “Why Should I”, “Why Do I have to”, “Why does it have to be this way” Creeps in and shuts the most beautiful relationship between brothers, Sisters, Wife, Husband, GF, BG, Friends, Neighbours, Office colleagues and you can count them on………

Why does this happen??

I was trying to find an answer but does it really matter to find out the reason why people have Ego. It does upsurge under certain circumstances. Sometimes it comes in because too many people are watching you when you have an argument with the other person, Ego Pops in your head and you tell something which makes you a Hero in an instant but you will fail to win the person with whom you are arguing. You may be a winner at that moment but what is the point??? You can win so many battles with your tongue but it’s hard to win a soul if your Ego tells things which are not resounding for the other person and you may lose his friendship or whatever relationship you have with him/her.

Family is one beautiful gift which anyone can have. It creates your own world with your children wonderful wife/husband but sustaining it building a castle out of it is a challenge which many fail to achieve. Why?? many a times it’s the “Ego”. You tell something and your partner says the other way round over a silly thing take for example buying a Refrigerator.  A Squabble disguises in the way of EGO, you keep arguing and finally you end up buying nothing. Why because “The I or self of any person” snaps  in and takes control, A simple 5 minutes on why do we need the Refrigerator and what is our purpose brings in harmony and also takes your relationship to the next Level.

In many relationships I have seen around me, a simple argument is where everything stars and it boils down and bursts in to two people going in two different ways. If you take a moment and look back all it is because of Ego, it’s all because of the “I” involved in it, we do not really think about “US”. WE do compromise most of the time but we fail to capitalise at the most important juncture in our relationship and leads to destruction.

Whoever is reading this remember one thing, When you say “I” and start arguing with the other person you are winning the battle but you are losing the Loved one. Within few minutes it will grow in to an enormous fight and it continues for days and you end up being alone looking for answers on why it happened?? Well you know the reason, you could have sat and made her/him understand and could have ditched your EGO instead of Ditching the relationship, when I say relationship it does not mean GF/BG, husband/wife, it also includes a relationship with your friend, with your mom/dad, with your shop keeper, with your boss, with a guy you meet on the roads, at the stadium, in a match it does not matter. This might be cliché but I don’t mind it “if there is no EGO our house and our town will be a paradise”   

Ego doesn’t have to be arguments it also holds back expressing your feelings, your emotions. Someone with whom you are in Love with, Ego sneaks in and holds you in expressing it to her/him. I have seen many friends who have not expressed their inner self to the one just because he/she does not want to take that step because he/she might lose the self-esteem and one more time “THE I” kicks in. Why do we have to hold back conveying our emotions just because of our EGO.  I had my share of crushes but I never expressed it to the other person just because I take pride in myself by not approaching them and telling them how I feel because “The I in me” says you might lose your dignity, I can’t do that anymore and I have an unequivocal feeling that the other person has the right to know how I feel we need to shed our skin and be the Real “US”

Ego kills everything. Kills your inner self, kills your mind, kills your smartness, kills your name tag and kills the moral instincts which might get buried till you hit the graveyard.

What am I trying to say?? Kill the Ego. What the heck mann, c’mon it is not going to give you the best out of you. It is not going to give you eternal happiness. It breaks relationships; it is not a pillar to build a relationship. When your mom/dad says you do it this way, instead of saying I will do it My  way, make them understand why you are doing it, maybe you are wrong, may be they are wrong but doing it “My way” is not the Way. Taking pride of your own Ego is like taking a pile of cow dung and splashing it on your face instead dry it and burn it you might be using it to warm yourself in the winter or for some itty bitty things.

Even for the silliest of things throw your EGO away deep inside the ocean. Let’s kick in begin a wonderful February without even the slightest EGO storming in when we talk to someone, when we do something, at our work place. Tell your wives how much you Love them rather than being a Man and holding back in expressing your thoughts, Tell your husband’s how you would want to snuggle and hear his childhood stories one more time, Nobody is getting old the world around us is getting older and dangerous,  stop arguing and make people understand. You aint gonna get a medal of honor.

Ego in my version is a self-Destructive, implausible Weak Object which rescinds our relationship. A Word which does not mend but bends and breaks.

Cheers